KOKO MANSION DANCE COMPETITION

Yeah we know that you would love a little bit on the side about Koko Mansion. The kokolettes had a dance competition; they were split into two teams, the red team and the blue team. They performed for D'banj and Kaffy to the Gbono Feli Feli song. The red team (Chidinma, Chinwe, Rekana and Lizzy) did quite a good job;Lizzy kind of messed it up for them but all in all, they won. The blue team (Shona, Victoria, Rita and Bolanle) tried a burlesque type of dance mixed with some clubby vibe and Rita was quite one to watch as she kept making fun of herself and she was adorable at the same time.

We should mention though that D'banj, if you want to talk to the "viewers" as you tried to do without much success yesterday, why don't you just say whatever you have to say before you start your one on one with the girls. Point taken we hope!! Thanks

GBONO FELI FELI VIDEO(D'BANJ)

Hi everybody, we just had to let you know about the new video by D'banj. He just brought out the Gbono Feli Feli video. Well, the video is a spin off from Usher's Caught Up video (if you are familiar with Usher, you would know what we are talking about). In this video, D'banj is sent out by Don Jazzy to rescue a girl and he does it without any interference from the kidnappers (like really!!!). Well, they chase him, catch up with him and then by some weird voodoo magic he goes poof in flames and dissappears into the ground. Again people (directors, producers) step away from all the voodooism!!! Even though we know that you might not take this advice from us, thanks all the same.

P.S He used a bentley in the video with a plate number bearing "D'KOKO" hmmm food for thought.

My first experience 1&2

Cast: Ini Edo, Desmond Elliot, Mercy Johnson, Kofi Adjololo

Overview: Basic Nigerian cinderella style movie where a person who is rich loves someone whose poor, seriously, we need more plots!!!. However they try to change it and make the guy poor, hence giving the title of cinderella to Desmond Elliot. Ini Edo is the rich girl here, with very annoying sidekicks (apart from Mercy Johnson), who cant speak good English and falls in love with Desmond, however has an American guy who loves her and the rest, im sure you can guess.

Ratings

Good: I must say, this is a very funny movie, and the good thing is that it never intended to be funny, which is what makes it very good. The housegirl is surprisingly funny, love the way she fakes grammatical errors "do you have any message to delivery". Desmond also plays a very poor guy well, even to the pot belly showing through his tight fitting shirt haha!!. Did you know that Desmond is left-handed!!, i found out in the movie, his best friends in the movie are also quite funny, better than those things called friends of Ini. Anyways, in general, funny movie.

Bad: First of all, Mercy Johnsons hair in the moive, i mean come on!!!, you are a very dark girl wearing gold hair. I was so happy when she changed it to black. All of them, the sidekicks, Ini Edo, the American boyfriend...what was with the fake english!!, i mean, Ini saying "Urs" instead of Us is wrong.Now, i think i need to become a stylist so that all my anger can be driven to making sure these actors can look good, the costumes were not good in anyway.haha!!, please watch out for a scene where Mercy Johnson says "Gushi 10k" (shes trying to say Gucci, 10k) and a very disgusting scene where she is trying to seduce a guy.

3 Stars

Ps- Please watch carefully during a scene where a woman is sleeping near her kiosk and a young boy comes and quickly steals buscuit and quickly zooms off, really funny.

The Celebrity

Cast: Ini Edo, Omotola Jalade, Desmond Elliot, Mike Ezuronye, Uche Jombo.

Overview: Red carpet movie about the secret life of celebrities, and basically how you can never judge a book by its cover. Omotola plays a love doctor of some sorts who is in a relationship with Desmond Elliot, a "famous" musician, who doesn't like the way Omotola displays their relationship to the "papparazi". Mike and Uche are in a very ridiculous relationship and the twist to this movie is that Mike plays a very bush Nigerian footballer, who has become rich and famous, like all of them end up being.

Ratings

Good: Mike plays the razz footballer soo well, he is very funny and displays the "igbo" culture well. Love the scene where Uche Jombo sees him cheating with the three girls and he starts screaming "Messup!!!!!". I give props to Omotola and Ini for there good acting, Omotola plays the love doctor really well and i think this is the first time i have actually seen Ini Edo act properly as she played the very Naive girl, going out with a jobless guy who wanted to start his own business some day.

Bad: As for me, what was with Desmond's costume, from the sprayed on coloured hair, to the earings and gold jewellry. Secondly, Omotola's British accent was sooo bad and pushed, couldn't stand the way she would have these soliloquies that never made sense. Not to mention Ini Edo who kept going on to her very ugly boyfriend about being his own "burrs" (boss by the way). Then there was a production going on in the movie with Omotola's show and it was really done badly, really hope thats not the way our Nigerian movies are done.

4 Stars

PS. watchout for a scene where this young guy runs through a football field as fast as he can for no good reason, just because he hears the police are looking for him. Really funny scene.

KOKO MANSION EVICTION

CHIOMA: Wow, well how or where do we start with this? Is it how two girls were evicted or the fact that D'banj gave her two thousand dollars which according to sources was actually a pay off because he wanted to sleep with her and she declined so he thought that giving her some "shopping money" would lessen the blow of being evicted from the house,which we all know is not somewhere worth being in the first place anyways. This brings us to our first conclusion that Mr Dapo D'banj Oyebanjo is a scrub (you may fill in the gap as you wish).

I mean why would he raise the poor girls' hopes after evicting Bidemi and then just hit them with the shocker that two girls are leaving the koko mansion. Besides the way he said "Bidemi/Chioma please take your suitcase,there is a car waiting for you outside" with no emotion at all is very annoying. What he also said to Chioma was quite rude; giving her the money and saying "you might as well start your shopping early." (This brings us back to the fact that the "sex" issue might be true afterall).

I know this might sound a bit harsh considering the fact that Chioma might not have the opportunity to get this kind of money FOC (that's free of charge people) like that, but she should have walked straight to D'banj, dropped the money in his laps and shouted "BYE BITCHES" while walking out with her head held up high. Because either way, she was still being made fun of by Shona and Rekana who are just there by luck.

BIDEMI: Well, what can we say about her except for the fact that she did not do the yorubas any justice by being in the house like a fly on the wall, unnoticeable and just bland (sorry to say).

Finally, we all know that this KOKO MANSION is just a washed out version of FLAVOUR OF LOVE which in itself is a digusting waste of tv airtime. It is indeed sad how our people can't be original and spontaneous with their ideas.

KOKO MANSION!!!!!

Did you really think we would not talk about Koko Mansion. We decided that we would just randomly "converse" about the show. To begin with we thought we would talk about some girls every week.

Shona Merenu, 23

This graduate of Imo State University is something else. I think she is a bit two- faced; the day she came into the house, i remember vividly her wide, sweet smile that posed no threat, she was telling us how she loved knitting and all that bollocks. Now, she seems like a bitch to me, rude, insulting and attention seeking (subtley, smart girl). Bossing everyone around. It is then ironic that she makes the most grammatical mistakes in the house, not comparing to Rita who didn't finish secondary school. "i was very petted as a child", i mean COME ON!!!!!!!, the whole world is watching!, repeating HEAVESDROPPING constantly is not very good Shona. I think she should leave the house next, personally.

SUMMER 2009!!

Hi guys!!!!...its been a long time scince we posted anything on the blog..just to let you know were back :) and its going to be fun this summer.

xx

RELOADED

Cast: Ramsey Nouah,Desmond Elliot,Rita Dominic,Stephanie Okereke,Ini Edo,Van Vicker

Overview: This one is about a narrator who takes her viewers into the lives of three other women who have to deal with their various men in different ways due to the way they(the women) have been treated by these men. The narrator herself who thinks she has the perfect man,got a shocker at the end of it all. Want to know, then watch it to find out.

Ratings

Good: As for me, I quite liked the twists at the end of it. Each woman featured had her own problems and dealt with it very well. Stephanie's part as the scorned woman worked and she proved herself. Ini Edo's revenge on her husband was believable. All in all, each actor and actress brought his or her own uniqueness into the movie.

Bad: After all the hype surrounding this movie and its release, I found it quite dissappointing as I expected something more mind- blowing;I mean movies directed by Emem Isong are usually mind-blowing. Rita's role as the reporter was flat;I'm sorry but there was no life in her character. Sorry to say, but Kate Henshaw's role as the narrator in Games Men Play was far much better than this one that Rita Dominic strived so hard to do without success. Please the soundtrack sounded as if someone was howling in pain what the hell was that all about. Whoever was in charge of that should have at least put in some more effort now haba!!!! Lastly, Stephanie please enough with the accent it only makes you sound wierd it is better if you speak normal English ok!! we know that you studied English in the university.

3STARS

TUFACE-ENTER THE PLACE

Listen, I'm no hater or anything as such,but why the hell was Tuface and Sound Sultan screaming "Enter the place" as if they wanted listeners and viewers to take notice, as if their lives depended on it. Well I certainly did take notice and the song annoyingly keeps ringing in my head. In fairness though they tried with the production but please whose car was the red one I saw in that video with the number plate "G-BANKS" na wa o. Tubaba abeg next time try putting your own name on the number plate if not for anything but "effizy" effects you hear. Except the "G-BANKS" is one of your names which we are yet to know.

Tomorrow Must Wait

Cast: Omotola Jalade, Nadia Buari, Nonso Diobi, Rukky Sanda

Overview: This is about a girl who does all she can to help her poor boyfriend graduate from university and she actually goes to extreme measures but maybe it does really happen but you'll have to watch it to figure it out. The boy graduates quite alright but then after graduation,getting into the real world,he discovers that it's a whole new ball game,and whatever he decides to do will affect his girlfriend. In a good or bad way, find out.

Ratings

Good: Omotola and Nadia both played their parts well,and I'm sure Nonso Diobi must be thanking his stars because he gets to work with both actresses hmmm, something to add to his acting CV definitely. Rukky also played her part properly as the roommate who takes advantage at any given opportunity.

Bad: Well, I might be wrong but I think that it is high time Omotola stopped accepting undergraduate roles because she is getting too old for them and it is becoming pretty obvious. Also,I wonder why it takes ages to release sequels. We are still waiting for this one o; because it is annoying to watch a movie and then wait for such a long time for the sequel and then you end up forgetting what it was all about.

3 STARS

NOTE TO NOLLYWOOD COSTUMIERS/WARDROBE PEOPLE

Please,please,please!!! stop giving castoffs of the lead actresses to their sidekicks now. At least someone should be able to speak for them if they can't speak for themselves. Abi,how far now? Evidence of such are obvious in the following movies........ Yankee Girls,Gameboy,World of Tears and so on.

Doyin Owobamirin

Cast: Funke Akindele, Odunlade Adekola

In this movie,Odunlade kills his fiancee, and the spirit of the dead would not let him rest,wanting him to pay with whatever he has including his new fiancee.

Rating
Good: This movie is a typical Yoruba one but has a good twist and also both actor and actress did put in a good performance as expected of them. Funke Akindele did well as the aggrieved fiancee who tried to figure out everything that was going on around her.
Bad: As usual, we have the "juju" but this one was overly fetish. The picture quality was nothing to write home about and please what was with the insults in English; in one scene, Funke was trying to insult her gateman or whoever he was and she said "callywag" rather than "scallywag". People!!! if you are not confident about your English then don't say it. Although I must say that i expected more from Funke. But still it could have been a slip of tongue that was done on purpose. Either way we still love you Funke keep up the good work.

3 STARS

Pointless!!!

Lol!! it's not necessary in this blog, but we have named this section Pointless. This is our first one. I-Go-Dye in a bow tie. This Warri- born comedian is showing his diversity but come on I-Go-Dye Na Wetin?. To the necklace to the Waist coat under the jacket. His neck then looks really long with the gigantuous bow tie. Still love you though. LMAO!!. 

Ps stick to normal suits.

Love My Way

Cast: Genevive Nnaji, Jim Iyke, Tonto Dike,

Kayleen and Kayla are two different girls with different personalities. Jim Iyke is a guy looking for the perfect wife however his current woman is not the ideal partner, even though he tries to make her into what he wants her to be all to no avail but an unfortunate incident turns everything around.

Rating

Good:Genevive plays a twin wonderfully, again seeing that she has done this a couple of times. Jim iyke plays a good guy well (finally!) and i love the plot of this movie. Watch out for this actress Tonto and she is not only hot but a very good actress. I couldn't stop looking at her hair (sorry about that). The guy that plays the doctor is also very good and i remember him in Doctors Quarters. All four acted very well, giving a good performance.

Bad:Side Kicks again!!!!, why are all the side kicks really annoying. Genevive's side kick was the most disgusting person ever. Not only couldn't speak proper english but i couldn't stop staring at the huge gap in her teeth and her makeup. The Jim Iyke really needs to stop adding the letter L to his English! i mean why is he saying "lets gol" ITS GO!! NOT GOL!! please i know ure trying to speak like a whit person but im sure they don't add unnecessary consonants.

4 STARS

Wande Coal

Born Wande Ojosipe on the 18th of October 1985. The 22 year old Wande is the 1st child in a family of 2 children. Wande like most great musicians started singing in the teenage choir at his church. he got his break in the Nigerian entertainment industry as a dancer. He continued improving his vocal skill and got signed to Don jazzy’s Mo’ Hits records in 2006. He featured on D’banj’s Rundown/Funk You up album on singles like; Loke, tonosibe and why me. Being signed to Mo’ Hits records he is also a member of the Mo’ Hits allstars, and played a major role in the recently released CV (Curriculum vitae) album. His first single of the CV album “Ololufe” has been described as the greatest love song ever written by a Nigerian. Wande Coal has also recorded track with other Nigerian artist including; Ikechukwu, Naeto-C, SID D’Prince and P-Lola.He has been dubbed the town crier because of his performance where he announces the entrance of D’banj singing D koko. Now he has a new album called, Mushin to Mo Hits, but this dude isnt from Mushin, so why is he laying claims to Mushin. Its his grandparents that lived in Mushin not him. Reports reaching us have claimed that Don Jazzy controls him, i'm sure he washes cars for him when the cameras are not rolling. He is also on lockdown, as his every move is controlled by Don Jazzy. Anyway, he looks like the future of Nigerian RnB so look out for him. Nice picture Wande.x

Jenifa 1&2

Cast: Funke Akindele, Iyabo Ojo, Mosun Filani, Jide Kosoko, Odunlade Adekola, Yinka Quadri.

I know it is a well known movie, but i have to say that this movie is one of the best comedies of Nollywood. Funke plays a campus babe who is freshly off the boat and wants to be a big girl at all costs.

Rating:

Good: She plays the village girl very well and i am very sure even after the movie some of the Razzness brushed off on her. It is very funny with very funny lines."oush!" lool, i couldn't stop laughing in the movie which is very hard to come across in Nigerian movies. It shows the shortcomings in the university enviroment properly.

Bad: Even though the movie was filled with grammatical error, in Jenifa's part, i still noticed that some of the "bigz girls" in the movie could not speak proper english like little miss Tracy saying someone's english is "worst". Then, i know that Nollywood is improving, people have been talking about how women keep the same hairstyles for years on but in this movie they tried to show diversity. This is why you could clearly see that theses women had the "pleasure" of changing wigs in the movie. We viewers had to go through a whole scene looking at Iyabo Ojo's patched up hair in the hair net before wearing a wig. Thanks producers!!.

4 STARS

Wrong Passion

Cast: Jackie Appiah, Stephanie Okereke, Olu Jacobs

Normal Nigerian movie about aristo's and young campus girls but instead this time it's Jackie (Thank God),and she has a controlling mother who is bount on sucking all the money from Mr. Jacobs.

Rating:

Good:Olu Jacobs plays the part of the perverted old man very well.So well, infact that i have to look up on some of his records if he was in any thing like that.He stalks her well, toasts her well and even manages a "sex scene". The story line is wonderful as it also gives a nice twist to a cliche like movie.The ending, also i must say is wonderful as i didn't expect it. This is very rare in Nigerian movies as i usually know the end from the song.

Bad: Even though the movie is good i should say Jackie's mother in the movie kinda irritated me a bit, with her funny hair and the dresses to the constant repitition of "delicate condition" (you will understand if you watch the movie). Also Jackie looks soo unattractive poor and unkept, you would never know that it is the same girl.

4STARS

Yankee Girls 1&2

Cast: Omotola Jalade, Rita Dominic, Stella Damasus,Chinyere Wilfred.

Basic Nigerian Bitch fight movie,where three girls are fighting for men and power. Its basically what you guess it will be, sex, big cars, juju as usual.

Rating

Good:The cars!!!, at least they dont look borrowed, unlike most of Jim Iyke's movies with the fake plate number and the way he drives them(seeing as he would not want to spend the rest of his fortune repairing them). Omotola even manages to destroy the wind screen of a hummer which i found very surprising as i assume most of these movies have a budget worth that windsreen so its good to know they earn much more.

Bad:To begin with i think Rita shouldn't have been in that movie as she looked very little and of no class in the movie, not to talk of the silly white hat that she wore throughout. Secondly, the white guy obviously couldn't act. I'm guessing thats why he came over to Nigeria as they would jump on the next white guy they see, and Hollywood would throw him out, not looking at him once.The sidekicks, omg!!! what the hell, are they not supposed to be giving advise?!. What was with the bright, neon pink lipstick that they were wearing. Please, youre supposed to look good, not blind us viewers. The ending of this movie is soo stupid and i really hope there is a sequel for it. Then what was with the title, none of these girls even steped out of the continent no to talk of Nigeria.

2 STARS

Beauty and The Beast

Cast: Olu Jacobs, Nadia Buari, Ngozi Ezeonu, Emeka Okoro, Mike Ezuruonye.

Well i really dont think i should explain this as the title speaks for itself. This is about a prince who was cursed due to his lack of respect for everyone and the story just goes on like the usual fairytale.

Rating

Good: Nadia plays the part of beauty quite well and her make-up was done properly. Olu Jacobs interpreted his role very well and we can at least say that they got the story of "Beauty and the Beast" correct for the first time in the line-up of copied American storylines.

Bad: Although Nadia's makeup was good, i have to say that "the Beast" makeup was very horrible, i know it was supposed to be a deliberate thing but this was stupid. I mean, what was with the long Acrylic nails and the patches of hair on his face. He is supposed to look like a beast and not a Meth user.Apart from that, i would say the movie is ok, if you want watch the appalling english spoken by the "handsome" prince in the first scene, the witch who placed the curse and the boyfriend who just didn't get that the girl never loved him. Hope you enjoy.

2 STARS

Actor Profile- VAN VICKER

Van Vicker is the 30 year old actor in the Ghana Film Industry, Africa, who is usually cast as the male romantic lead in films, often alongside actresses Jackie Appiah and Nadia Buari. Born on the 1st of August, he is of Liberian-Ghanaian descent.He has been married to Adjoa Van Vicker for four years and they have two daughters J-dyl, three and J-ian, one. Is Van Vicker rich? All he could say was that he is comfortable. Aside acting , he hosts a programme on TV called Game TV and runs Sky+Orange, an advertising agency and events management company. 

He also runs a barbering shop (LOL!!!), Babetown, where one can also shop for trendy clothes and shoes, play pool, listen to some good music, watch movies and have a drink.Wow, unbelievable, all in one shop!!. Well, on the bright side, he has a damn good body, as you can see for yourself.

Royal Blood

Cast: Oge Okoye, Michael, Ngozi

A film of betrayal and deception. Its kinda like the story of Joseph, except it is set in the Village and a hint of romance is added to it.

Rating

Good:Although the movie can seem a bit predictable, i would say there is a hidden twist in the movie which no one would see coming and i really like that.

Bad: Characterisation was bad as i didn't know half of the Cast. These actors didnt bring it, in any way and watch out for a scene where this random "prince" talks about his trip to the Uk. Please sir if you are coming from the UK you never say 'Thruma' instead of 'Trauma'. Secondly, Oge Okoye is holding her Princess staff which is a duster, a very colourful one.Lastly, i want to advise the Producer never EVER to try and make a Nigerian movie with an Egyptian style. Thanks we can watch Prince of Persia whenever we want to.

WORST MOVIE OF 2008

King's Battle 1&2

Cast: Jim Iyke, Omotola Jalade, Patience Ozokwor

Omotola is the Nigerian born in America girl who wishes to see her motherland at all cost, and this leads to a lot of events unfolding, due to her return to Nigeria.Jim plays twins who are princes to the throne.

Rating:

Good: There is a lot of cultural knowledge. The movie tries to tell young people to come back home which is a very important topic. The costumes are also done very well. Surprisingly, Patience's "nice" character was believable, considering her history of mean lady.

Bad: To begin with, the "America" scene was obviously done in a home in Ikeja, The accent, secondly, that Omotola tried to portray was quite upsetting to American citizens. Jim Iyke could not play a twin to save his life. This was not his calling as he should stick to bad boy city movies. Village scenes are not his thing. Lastly this was bad characterisation as who in the world pairs up Iyke and Omotola to act their undying love for each other considering their height.

2 STARS

Letters To A Stranger

Cast:Genevive Nnaji, Fred Amata, Joke Silva, Elvina Ibru, D'banj, Yemi Blaq

A breath taking movie that makes you feel happy and frustrated at the same time. It is a very romantic movie played very well by the sexy Yemi Blaq. Nnaji has to choose between two men who both have different effects in her life. Find out to see who she chooses.

Rating:

Good: The love scenes, the lines, the jokes are all done and spoken well with no grammatical and accent error. It is done in a hollywood style and it deserves some credit.

Bad: Though the story line was almost perfect i have to say that the Fred Amata's acting was a bit wierd, he kept shaking his lip, looking very ridiculous. I also wonder why Segun Arinze was added stupidly as the philosophical cab driver at the end scene, screaming down at Genevive? What was that all about?

4 STARS

Caught In The Act-Titanc Sister

Cast: Genevive Nnaji, Nonso Diobi, Clarion Chukwura, Uche Jombo.

Genevive plays a woman accused, by her mother-in-law of cheating on her husband and not willing to give him a second child. However, there are other issues surrounding her family and personal life which she cannot fathom.

Rating

Good: Genevive's change in character is played perfectly and she even shows dualism in language. It also shows a different aspect of Nigerian societal defects. The other actors did very well.

Bad: The sequel of the movie, has a questionable title, I mean, please, why Titanic sister, what is "titanic" about it? if you think about the Titanic, the first thing that comes to your mind is a ship that sinks, but this is about sisters so what is going on?.Lastly not to be rude but i couldn't stop staring at the little girl with the twitching eye.

3 STARS